by Than Acuff
The Talk of the Town is gaining momentum as they head closer to post-season play in the Wednesday league. Two weeks ago they took down the undefeated Pita’s OGs, all the while celebrating Cis Berry’s 50th birthday.
They followed that up with another win last week as they beat the Last Steep a lot to a little at Gothic Field.
And by a lot to a little I mean, 33-2.
Wait a minute, Goat Yoga?
Yeah, you read it right, Goat Yoga. It is real and sweeping the nation. Well, actually, it has taken hold in Boulder. Go figure. Which, given the recent influx of Front Rangers to Crested Butte, could lead to Goat Yoga in Crested Butte.
Yoga for the Bleatful.
According to ABC News, Goat Yoga is here to Namaste (I almost threw up in my mouth with that one).
Or, as one person put it, Baamaste.
What is Goat Yoga, you may ask? Well, you may not, but I did and I’m going to tell you anyway. Besides, reminds me of a great joke.
“An old Irishman shuffles into a bar with his head down and the bartender says, “Billy, what’s the matter? You seem troubled.”
Billy responds, “You see this bar we’re standing in? I built it with me own hands. But they don’t call me the Billy the bar builder, do they?
“And the bridge everyone uses to cross the river to get to the market, I built that that with me own hands too. But do the call me Billy the bridge builder? No.
“And the wall that protects our city, I built that with me own hands too but they don’t call me the Billy the wall builder neither.
“But you **** one goat…”
As I was saying, Goat Yoga. People are doing their yoga thing while baby goats are walking around and doing what baby goats do.
Quick, someone call the TA! Goat Yoga Festival!
Back to the game.
Scoring 20 runs is often, but not always, enough. Twenty-five runs is piling it on some. But when you break the 30-run mark that’s borderline cruel and unusual punishment. Then again, when you’re in the groove, you’re in the groove. Besides, with the post-season just a week away, when you find that groove, you don’t want to lose it. Especially when there’s Pita’s OGs in your league who can also easily break the 30-run mark, as long as their big hitters don’t waste dingers on solo shots.
But to do it to a team such as the Last Steep—well, it happens. The Last Steep has been struggling all season, winning just one game. They’re not bad, they’re just… misunderstood.
But, the game Wednesday night may have been the lowest point of the season for the Last Steep as not only did they suffer an atrocious beat down, they were missing players, specifically women, despite having 11 signed up on their roster.
That left them in the quandary at the start of the game of, play eight and not take an automatic out or play nine and take the automatic out.
Well, they opted for the former strategy to open the game, playing eight and the Talk of the Town made them pay big time as they littered the field with base hits, 11 to be exact, to take a 10-0 lead.
The Last Steep made no progress in their first at-bat but did adjust their plan, opting to go with nine players to tighten up things defensively and take the automatic out when at-bat.
The move worked, I guess, as they held the Talk to just four runs in the top of the second inning. Kelly McGuire knocked her third base hit of the game to open the inning and then jogged home when Tom Consentino announced his return from the injured reserves with a two-run home run to straightaway centerfield. Steep pitcher Shane McDermott did scoop up a grounder for an out, as did first baseman Zach Baker but Dakota Wiggins doubled and scored on a double by Rachel Potoker. Dave McGuire drove another run in and it looked like another 10-run inning for the Talk before Salina Ray flagged down a line drive down the third base line to put a stop to the Talk.
Robbie Vandervoort, perhaps one of the best lead-off hitters in the game, opted for an inside the park home run rather than his usual double to put the Talk up 15-0 and Consentino punched a three-run homer over the right field fence. The Talk was flirting with 20 runs in just the fourth inning before the dynamic defensive duo of Ray and Lilah Hubbard connected to get a force at second for a brief pause in the pain.
Two questions then arose with the game in the bottom of the fourth and the Last Steep down 19-0: Would the Last Steep score? And would the Talk break the 30-run mark?
The first question was soon answered as a single up the middle followed by a double from Baker (miss watching Dodger Dusty Baker play) set the Steep up for their first run. Ida Ray stepped to the plate with two outs, two on and delivered as she perfectly placed a power-swat change-up hit (PPPSCUH) equidistance between the pitcher, the catcher and the third baseman to confuse the Talk defense and score two Last Steep runs.
But that would be it for the Last Steep as the Talk of the Town remained in the groove to continue slapping base hits all over the place. The Talk tacked on six more runs in the top of the sixth inning to go up 25-2 and with time and enthusiasm running out, looked to fall short of the 30-run mark.
But, they rebooted in the top of the seventh inning to knock 11 more base hits, scoring eight runs in the process, to finish almost as hot as they started for the 33-2 win, answering the second question from before.