April Fools: Blue Heron Hunting Camp opens

“They’re just so big and so slow”

[ by Joe Kizanu ]

Jed Bush was approved for his new business the Blue Heron Hunting Camp with permitted floats down the Slate River from late March into mid-May. It’s all part of the latest drive to generate tourism in the “shoulder” season.

“It’s another great way to expand the shoulder season market and we’re ‘tapping’ into a new demographic, fragile species hunting enthusiasts,” says the Tourism Allocation Prosperity Project Association (TAPPA) director Jim Norton. “Now we will have people visiting Crested Butte 24-7, 365. Which happens to be our new marketing slogan, Crested Butte, 24-7, 365. Once the ski area shuts down, this place is a ghost town until Memorial Day so now we can bring people here when it’s quiet and make even more money.”

Bush is ecstatic with the approval pointing out to county officials how his business addresses two markets, the drive market and the float market.

“It kills two birds with one stone and no infrastructure is needed,” says Bush. “There’s already a pull out built along the Slate road with a sign pointing to them so people can just drive out, pull over and pop one from their car. Or, with the new bridge and parking already in place at Gunsight Bridge, a rather appropriate name by the way, they can drive out, park and float down the slate on their SUP and shoot one or even smack one with their paddle. Talk about a unique experience. Seeing nature up close, and killing it.”

The first permits were issued just last week and Bill Toole was the first to partake in the aviary assault getting permits and licenses for both “pull over and pop” and ”paddle by and pummel.”

“My buddy and I got four in the first day,” says Toole. “They’re just so big and so slow. It’s like they say, it’s as easy as shooting fish in a barrel, but different. It’s as easy as shooting a heron in its’ nest.”

Unfortunately, Toole and his buddy killed all four herons and the season was over before it really even started.

“Oh well, it seemed like a great idea at the time,” said Norton. “I think we can expand upon it though. With the amount of ‘hits’ on Travel CB, we’ve got eyes on Crested Butte from the months of April and May and I’m sure there are other ways to get thousands of people here when it’s a nice quiet town. Now can I get a raise?”

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