Monsoonal Flow disrupts softball playoffs

“When you get in the mud with a pig, you get dirty and the pig gets happy”

[ by Than Acuff ]

Thank God for the rain because we’d be up in flames by now without it. Somehow, playoff softball has been able to avoid the rain though, more or less, and the playoffs continued until Tuesday.

But, before we go there.

So, let me get this straight. If two athletes are going toe-to-toe in an Olympic event such as… the high jump, and they both reach a certain height that has them even, but above all others, they can opt to tie and both take home gold?

Lame.

If two people tie in the 200-meter sprint they should have a run off. If two people tie in the 100-meter fly they should have a swim off. If two people tie in the balance beam, put them on the beam at the same time with sticks to determine who wins. If two people tie in dressage they should have… who cares. Give the medals to the horses.

Even golf had a seven-man playoff for bronze. And I don’t like golf, mostly cause I suck at it, but I respect that decision.

Or what about a Thunderdome set up in a corner of the Olympic stadium. No matter what the sport the tie is in, the athletes have to go into the Thunderdome in whatever they wear in their sport, and go to battle. “Two men enter, one man leaves.” It happens every evening to conclude the days’ activities and Kevin Hart and Snoop Dogg are the announcers.

One thing there won’t be is a tie in is Crested Butte coed softball and we are getting closer to determining a winner in both leagues, Mother Nature willing.

Tuesday night was set up for some loser’s bracket showdowns as The Talk of the Town and the Hares were set to play, as were the Whetstoners and the Eldo, loser would be done and the winner would stay alive. But alas, the games were postponed until Thursday.
As it stands, everyone but the Dingers and the Walk of Shame, still has a shot at the title with six teams in the loser’s bracket battling to stay alive. Eventually, either top-seeded Elevate or five-time league Tuesday/Thursday league champion Pitas Meatsticks will be thrown in there as well as they square off in the winner’s bracket final on Tuesday, August 10.

My best guess is the loser of the Meatsticks/Elevate showdown will meet either Psycho Rocks or Steal Your Base but you never know.
Meanwhile, over in the Wednesday league, Momentum Landscaping and KBUT are out. Also, four-time Wednesday league champion Pitas OG’s are in the loser’s bracket. Furthermore, CB Extreme had a seven-run lead in the top of the fifth inning on the seemingly unbeatable Rainbow Unicorns in a playoff game before Mother Nature stepped in. They will be picking up where they left off this week to determine who gets dropped to the loser’s bracket and who will play the Rasta Hairnets, who are iron like a lion in Zion right now, in the winner’s bracket.

It is the playoffs and I’ve seen stranger things happen, like the addition of 3-on-3 basketball into the Olympics. Does it deserve to be there? I’d argue more than dressage. The barstools are heating up with debates like these. All I know is there’s already basketball, why add in three-on-three basketball? I think to allow more countries to compete in the Olympics and win medals. In the end, five of the six teams that won medals were not American, so that’s cool.

If I’m a country with professional leagues, both men’s and women’s, like Latvia (Pafbet LBL), Serbia (KLS), Croatia (HT Premijer liga), China (CBA) etc., i.e. countries that have a handful of NBA or WNBA level players, I would stack my three-on-three team to bring home some hardware rather than go for medals in five-on-five.

Furthermore, does three-on-three Olympic basketball open the doors to players that are really good but not good enough for the NBA, Pafbet LBL, CBA etc. or a country’s Olympic five-on-five team? Perhaps, which would be cool. I watched an afternoon’s worth of three-on-three at an outdoor court in California once and I swear I was seeing NBA caliber players. True, there was not a lot of defense played and when there was, a foul was called and an argument ensued, but they were good. As long as the Olympic three-on-three allows for alcohol and weed on the sidelines, I think we got something and let’s do this.

Dear IOC,
Money talks and bulls**t walks so here’s $50 to get in the three-on-three tournament. We’re called the RubbA ToeZ, RATZ for short, and we will be representing… Guam? Yeah, Guam, and our name is actually the Guam RATZ.
See you in Paris 2024.

Doc
But ties? Hell no.

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