Inglorious Batters squash Toad Property Management

Here we go, kinda sorta

by Than Acuff

It was meant to be another triumphant start to the Wednesday league season on Wednesday, May 27 with a stellar evening and one of my favorite local teams, the Inglorious Batters, taking on Toad Property Management at Tommy V Field.

But it wasn’t.

The Batters were there. Our photographer was there. I was there. Some rando fans were there. But Toad? Not so much, and my blood started to boil, and I was drafting my opening paragraphs slamming Toad for their absence. I have a thing about teams not showing up for games.

But after some investigative reporting free of government interference, I came to find out that there was an extenuating circumstance as Toad Property Management had some property to manage. Specifically, the Grand Lodge was flooding.

So, instead of slamming them, I will tout the team’s resilience as the four players that did show up made some calls and managed to rally a team for the game and the season officially started.

And what a start it was as Batters leadoff hitter Nicole Bogenschuetz, German for bow hunter, started it all with a solo Inside the Park Home Run (ITPHR) but the Toad defense then shut it down to hold the Batters to the lone run.

Toad stepped to the plate in the bottom of the first inning and Kate Kulow dropped a pop up powerbunt single to get things going. Sam Nease followed with a single, Georgia Behrens advanced the runners with a sac hit and Reid Winter stroked an RBI double to tie the game.

But much like the title of the novel by Chinua Achebe Things Fall Apart, things fell apart for Toad Property Management as the Inglorious Batters flooded the field for a 10-run inning.

Alaska PA Grant Robbins, the new Netflix Series, led it all off with a casual triple to right center. Ashley Bouey pushed him home with a single, Robin Gross, of town league hockey title fame, then drove two more Batters in with a double and Bogenschuetz tripled on her initial effort at the plate smacking a three-run ITPHR for a 7-1 lead. RBI base hits from Stephanie Reeves and Shannon Hessler tacked on two more Batter runs and then Robbins stepped up to stroke a three-run home run to left field for a 12-1 lead and forcing the umpires to enact the Mercy Rule.

Toad did have a little more to give in the bottom of the second inning as Bayless Baker connected for a solo ITPHR, but the Batters limited it to that and proceeded to score eight more runs in the top of the third inning. Alex Reeves joined the ITPHR party with a two-run shot, Bogenschuetz proved the most prolific at the plate with a two RBI triple and Trent Smith and Robbins followed with RBI base hits to continue pouring it on.

Given the late start, and the time limits on games, Toad Property Management got one last shot at hitting in the bottom of the third inning but produced nothing at the plate to fall 20-2.