The Crested Butte News Serving the Gunnison Valley since 1999
by Dawne Belloise
“The only thing worse than being blind is having sight but no vision”
– Helen Keller
Last week, my perspective of the world was exponentially changed for good. I went through cataract surgery and in the course of about an hour, it changed my vision and essentially, my reality, in a major transformational way.
Prior to the procedure, I didn’t realize that my sight had been veiled in yellowing, darkened light. My visual reality of non-existent edges was an impressionistic painting of blurred brush strokes that merely hinted at the forms of people, landscapes and objects. On the positive side, sunsets were still an ever-changing palette of reds and oranges, filling the air and shadows with golden hues. Autumn colors were outstanding and everything had a warm, fuzzy glow. I lived in a Renoir painting, my world was softly beautiful and blurred, with no sharp edges. But it was, I discovered, a false reality.
Edith Wharton once said, “Look not at visions but at realities,” but the realization was that my interpretation of what was real was merely a false visual impression manifested by flawed eyesight. What’s the difference between illusion, delusion and imagination for that matter? It’s a question I’ve been asking myself since I was about 12 years old and engrossed in science fiction books. Buddhists say that reality is an illusion, but maybe, illusion triggers imagination which in turn spawns a certain reality. Motorola had the vision to produce the first flip cell phone, the StarTAC, back in 1996 which was surely based on the imaginative 1960s Star Trek communicator designed for the TV series. The illusion of a communicator became the reality of an actual phone. Edith Wharton was wrong; visions can become reality and Motorola had vision.
Imagination is considered to be the origin of delusion and consequently hallucinations, according to some psychological studies. Those flower child hippies of the 1960s, whose visions of peace, love and understanding, after turning on, tuning in and dropping out, induced alternate realities which inspired a counterculture movement set out to erase the boundaries between reality and fantasy. They were determined to imagine and create the reality they wanted to live in because their generation was disillusioned with the status quo reality. They had vision.
Young children live in an imaginary, fantastical world. They see and experience things on a different reality level altogether. To a child at Christmastime, Saint Nick is very real and indeed, Saint Nicholas was a real person whose story was embellished over the centuries. The concept of flying reindeer shuttling a jolly rotund man dressed in red across the sky in a sled to deliver gifts is not considered delusional, and the power of story, if the illusion is continually asserted, becomes truth to the masses of children. We see these phenomena happening with adults as well currently with mainstream news and media. Children, with their vivid imaginations, can conjure up visions of sugar plum fairies and North Pole elves making their toys because it is the story they’ve been told to believe and so to them, the illusion is, happily, very real.
When my four younger brothers and I were kids, my dad would sneak out one of the bedroom windows to deposit wrapped and ribboned presents at the front door on Christmas Eve before crawling back into the house to announce, “I hear sleigh bells! Do you hear them?!” My then five-year-old brother Chuck, who had one of the more active imaginations, excitedly ran to the front window, eyes widening, and screamed, “I hear them, I hear them!” The younger two brothers, influenced by Chuck’s infectious affirmation, were convinced they too could hear those bells. It was real for them, and as the front door was opened to reveal the gifts left by Santa, their vision verified the perceived truth of the illusion. It didn’t matter whether they were deluded because the giggles, grins and joy were real.
In the gradual loss of my vision over the years, I didn’t know my world had dulled until my eyes were repaired and then everything looked completely different and wondrous. I felt like Dorothy opening that door from the black and grey interior of her tossed Kansas house to the vibrant colors of the alternate reality in Munchkinland of Oz. Suddenly, I could see tiny winter buds on trees, jagged edges of ridgelines, the contrast of snow in sunlight against the deeper blue couloirs on the mountains, and the colors… the colors were now brilliant, sharp and otherworldly. This had not been my reality. I had quite suddenly arrived in Oz and was in awe. I had vision.
So, what of living in delusional realities? We’re fortunate enough to live in this mountain town that has always been a very different reality than the “real” world and we’ve worn its uniqueness like a badge of honor. For visitors and outsiders, our world here may seem like a fantasy, an alternate reality to the rest of the so-called outside world. But it is our reality, and we built this place based on our vision and what we wanted our reality to be, and that’s the vision we must hold onto. For many of us here at the end of the road, our reality is joyously getting together with friends and enjoying everything this community has to offer in a paradisiacal environment while dealing with the continuing matter of securing necessities like affordable housing, food, libations, ski pass and maybe someone to warm your bed during these frigid winter nights (dog, cat, significant other).
As Gandalf said in one of the Lord of the Rings movies, “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.” If that time is filled with magical moments in a paradise we created through our vision, with close friends, faeries and elves, Greenmen and Grumps, children’s laughter, powder days and smiling dogs, whether delusional or simply imaginative, that’s the reality I want to create for myself and share with those who have vision and are willing to dream.
Happy Christmas, Merry Yule, glad tidings and blessings to all.
